Valuable Lessons Learned

Kathy Wedding DayLR

(Photo Credit:  My wedding photographer, sorry, I can't remember his name.)

This is me, 20 years ago on my wedding day (June 21, 1991 to be exact).  What I would give to go back and talk to this woman before the ceremony.  For example:

"Everything you are feeling is correct.  It's okay.  Thank everyone for coming and call it off, and you and this man need to go your separate ways."

But no, I didn't do that.  I suppose both of us had valuable lessons to learn.  We were both to blame for the failure of our marriage.  By September of 1993, we were divorced.  No children were involved.  We don't keep in touch, but I wish him well.

What I learned from my brief marriage was that you can't go into a relationship expecting to change someone else.  You can only change yourself.  I have never forgotten that lesson.

Some years, I totally forget about that day so long ago.  Yesterday, I remembered my wedding day with full clarity.

It's a little sad to think about all of the hopes and dreams the two of us shared that just melted away in the face of reality.

I never regretted the decision to divorce, I only wish I had entered into the union with a lot more forethought.  

I could have saved both of us a lot of grief and heartache.

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